Being a straight, married guy, I might not fit the traditional mould of what you’d expect as an LGBTQ activist. ...
This past easter weekend, I celebrated my 41st birthday. It was great to have that fall on the long weekend so Lisa and I could have my parents visit us from Ottawa for the first time in the new condo. This visit was nice and special like most of our visits since we don’t get to see each other too often. Having moved away from home when I was 19, it’s always been a common thing in my life not to live in close proximity to my parents.
I often imagine how my life would be different if we did live closer. I see my friends who see their parents every day…the casual drop-in, the help with bringing them shopping or appointments. The “I was too busy to cook tonight so I dropped by mom and dad’s for a quick bite” scenario. I never get any of this and there’s a part of me that wishes I did have this luxury. But then there’s the independent part of me that likes having my space, so it’s all very confusing emotionally!
I will say this though…every time they leave Toronto or I leave Ottawa, I always feel a void and emptiness. It usually lasts for about a day and then life distracts me and I forget all about it. Phone calls and emails once or twice per week definitely help. But what happens when they get older and they’ll need help? (I’m an only child.) I don’t want to have to dictate to them that they move to Toronto so I can look out for them more easily. Hopefully, I don’t have to deal with that life situation for awhile since my parents are only in their 60s and pretty self-sufficient. So for now, I will continue to deal with this long-distance relationship:)!
How about you? Do your parents live close or far? What are the emotional pros and cons for you? I would find your feedback helpful! Thanks, f.