Distant

Programme Notes

Yes, I can be distant. Sometimes it’s a shield, sometimes a barrier. It’s always been this way, as far back as I can remember. Alone in my thoughts, alone in my heart. People try to get close, but I push them away—unintentionally, of course. It’s not that I want to be cold or distant, but it’s the only way I know how to exist. I understand that it’s healthy to let others in, but I can’t seem to do it. It’s nothing personal, yet it feels personal all the same. It’s strange, really: to allow others in, I first need to love myself, but to love myself, I need to be alone, to feel comfortable within my own space. And so, the distance remains, between the world and me, growing ever more familiar.

– Frank Horvat